Letting go of the breath

[John MasseyMember]

Hi,

Great to be on the forum!

I was wondering if anybody has experienced this: Recently while I was meditating on the sensations of the breath (around stage 4-6 level) I noticed the beginnings of subtle dullness developing so I proceeded to increase my awareness/details of the meditation object until this dullness passed again. Next for no reason whatsoever the breath and my controlling of it just dropped away, its like a connection snapped. The breath virtually disappeared and so did my ‘control’ of it and its been the same ever since when I meditate and to a degree in daily life, its effortless or a better word might be iv just let go of it. It feels like learning to ride a bike, I thought I needed somebody to balance me and suddenly Iv realised there is nobody there and I don’t need the support, the breath just does its own thing and my consciousness now feels completely independent of it… It almost feels artificial to interfere with its natural cycle.

The problem I am having is that my breath is so soft/weak and the gap between breaths can be quite long so it feels a lot more difficult to retain one-pointedness and subtle distractions are increasingly entering my consciousness. I am able to retain introspective awareness but the ‘noise’ has increased since this occurrence. Its also a lot more difficult to find the breath in the body sensations when doing the breath/body scan due to it’s weakness. I can intentionally take control of the breath and increase its strength so aiding the awareness of sensations but it kind of feels false and now feels like it involves a lot of control and effort.

Anybody experienced this or has any ideas on where to go from here?

P.S. Hope the above makes some sense!!

Thanks in advance
John

[Blake BartonKeymaster]

Hi John,

Thanks for sharing your experiences. Using Culadasa’s technique, you are not supposed to consciously control the breath. So it is a good thing that you were able to let go of this control. Sometimes our unconscious mind does control the breath to make it easier to notice the sensations. That is OK as long as we do not intend to do this.

You should not be trying for one-pointedness in stages 4-6. It is only with the mastery of stage 6 that you are able to maintain exclusive attention on the meditation object. Trying for this too early can cause problems with your meditation.

When you notice subtle distractions just gently redirect your attention back to the sensations of the breath. Your mind will get better at noticing the subtle/weaker sensations. You can do things like following the breath (noticing the sensations that mark the beginning, middle and end of each inhale and exhale) to improve your clarity.

When you are breathing with the body scan, it is not important whether or not you actually feel sensations related to the breath in all body parts. For some body parts, you may not feel much of anything. For others you may feel sensations, but none caused by the breath. In others you may feel sensations caused by the breath. Try to do this practice without expectations. The intention to feel these sensations will increase your ability to notice subtle sensations over time even if you don’t actually feel anything.

I hope this is helpful, and I wish you good luck with your practice.

Blake

[John MasseyMember]

Thanks for getting back Blake. Yes, the breath control was/is largely unconscious, there is no intention to control it, it just happens when being drawn into observing it, like you said, to notice the sensations more clearly. It seems to happen more for me when there is a narrow concentration developing and less spatial/full minded awareness so it’s good to notice and not get too sucked into the object without this observing awareness. I also think I probably ‘upped the tempo’ when dullness was developing so to inject some energy into things and forgot to take my foot off the gas!!

It’s strange how I only just really noticed the unconscious intention to control the breath and then as soon as I noticed it how it just dropped away almost instantly. It’s still the same now, my breath has become so delicate and soft while meditating it feels almost absent at times, a really faint whisper with long gaps of seemingly no breath, that’s why it’s proving difficult to readjust and stay as concentrated as I previously was as the mind is wanting stimulation and seeking it elsewhere, hopefully it will adapt soon to the new surroundings.

Thanks for the body scan tips, I really get a lot from that practice it’s a powerful tool, it’s helping me lots.

…. and I didn’t mean I was actively trying for one pointedness when I sit merely I was following the practice as Culadasa set out and on occasions it is happening by itself anyway along with meditations filled with nice sensations, joy, lack of pain from dead legs and a withdrawal of outside noises etc, none of which I am actively seeking they just occasionally happen, it’s just this dropping of the breath seems to have changed things temporarily especially this stillness of the breath and the lack of sensation because of it.

Thanks again Blake really nice of you to reply with some great advice

Cheers
John

[Tim ClarkMember]

John,

Something else to consider:

Noticing is just noticing. The idea is to note where your mind has gone and return to your OOM (Object Of Meditation). It doesn’t matter all that much where your mind has gone so much as to note that it has gone and then, with awareness, return to your OOM. It will try to go to all kind of places: Noises, emotions (joy as well sadness), unusual breathing and other body situations, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc.

All these things can be distractions to developing mindfulness and following them can consume a lot of time and energy. So when you notice that you are no longer in the present moment make a choice. You might say something like, “knowing that I am no longer with my OOM do I want to pursue my distraction or just drop it and return to my OOM”. Sometimes the answer is yes, just make sure the choice is a conscious one.

This not to say that issues that come up in your sitting practice are not important; It is just when you sit you sit, when you sleep you sleep and when you eat you eat.

I hope this is helpful.

Tim

[Anonymous]

Hi John, I’ve had the same experience you describe with the breath becoming faint. I think think the biggest mistake I’ve made in my meditation practice over many months was trying to “force” feeling the breath vividly. You can get too wrapped up with trying to feel the sensations of the breath and it’s not good for your meditation. The most essential element of meditating is being aware of what you’re doing as much as possible. It is better to have a large scope of attention, like any sensation in the body and be continuously aware than to have a small scope of attention and be shifting in and out of awareness. Once you have gotten very good at being aware, then you can work on narrowing the scope of attention. I am still in the process of doing all of this, but that is my view.

[John MasseyMember]

Thanks tim, yes so many objects of awareness fighting for primary attention and centre stage, which one to pursue! Better to pursue none and stick with the conscious choice of the breath… until the next distraction sneaks up from behind and suddenly its time to make that conscious choice again.. and again… and again…

Couldn’t agree with you more Paul, the force element comes about through faint breath and dullness for me and my attempt to counter this by feeling the breath more (done unconsciously as I’m not trying to force the breath just feel more sensation and hopefully clear away the dullness). Im ever working on improving my full minded awareness I can see how important it is but i’m not there yet so gotta keep plugging away!!

Thanks for all the replies, I really appreciate you have taking the time to reply and a great help to me.

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